Tuesday, March 6, 2012
In hibernation
When English assignment suck balls for the Chinese students, I have a hard time with all the Chinese material every time. Don't complain.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Splatter some stardust over the earth
Been feeling rather thoughtful. Perhaps due to the fact that I've been spending more time alone, more time to actually re-enact the long semester and to actually ponder about possibilities.
I haven't been a good student. I haven't studied much, not something that I'm really proud of but still, I shall admit. Been drifting around school, loitering among social circles, mingling with friends whom have no qualms about my pea brain.
Never fond of putting my emotions on display. Felt misused, misunderstood and apprehensive. Occasionally I like to be a girl- someone who is able to whine and get her way around, someone who actually has someone to lean on. Eg a daddy's girl. Nah, my family does not really let me get my way around in Life. They believe in the tough experiences make the finest person. Grrrr. Perhaps.
In my twenty-first year of existence, I actually came to ponder about my shortcomings. Am I such a bad friend? Ooooh, did I really actually said that when I was young? Woaaaah, I am actually quite a happening kid during those young days. No, I was nowhere near innocent in a bitch fight those days.
Maybe that's why these memories and experiences form such a person like me right now. I used to be very self-blaming. I blame myself for the slightest mistake or glitch in conversation but now? I'll just shrug it off. Life's too short for blaming or mulling over people. We need to be mindful of our speech and action, but be more mindful of our own gain.
I tried and tried. I tried relentlessly to be more selfish.
But now, I'm nowhere near there. Yet, it's alright. At least I know, I'm still loved by a handful of people who I had reconciled this holiday. At the very least I know, I must had mattered to you.
I haven't been a good student. I haven't studied much, not something that I'm really proud of but still, I shall admit. Been drifting around school, loitering among social circles, mingling with friends whom have no qualms about my pea brain.
Never fond of putting my emotions on display. Felt misused, misunderstood and apprehensive. Occasionally I like to be a girl- someone who is able to whine and get her way around, someone who actually has someone to lean on. Eg a daddy's girl. Nah, my family does not really let me get my way around in Life. They believe in the tough experiences make the finest person. Grrrr. Perhaps.
In my twenty-first year of existence, I actually came to ponder about my shortcomings. Am I such a bad friend? Ooooh, did I really actually said that when I was young? Woaaaah, I am actually quite a happening kid during those young days. No, I was nowhere near innocent in a bitch fight those days.
Maybe that's why these memories and experiences form such a person like me right now. I used to be very self-blaming. I blame myself for the slightest mistake or glitch in conversation but now? I'll just shrug it off. Life's too short for blaming or mulling over people. We need to be mindful of our speech and action, but be more mindful of our own gain.
I tried and tried. I tried relentlessly to be more selfish.
But now, I'm nowhere near there. Yet, it's alright. At least I know, I'm still loved by a handful of people who I had reconciled this holiday. At the very least I know, I must had mattered to you.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Occasionally
I envy people.
People who are fond of making long-term relationships, friendships.
Never mind that it wasn't intentional.
Never mind that I wasn't that much bothered.
Never, mind.
People who are fond of making long-term relationships, friendships.
Never mind that it wasn't intentional.
Never mind that I wasn't that much bothered.
Never, mind.
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